101 uses for an Overwieght Brazillian Football player Superstar.

1. World Championship weightlifting Wieght
2. Papper weight (may break desk)
3. Consuming oposition fullbacks. (there are rules against biting but not swallowing whole).
4. Comic relief.
5. Playing the "how many fat jokes can the commentator make" game
6. Writing about on childish Blogs.
7. Feeling better about yourself (i might not be an international football star but at least i'm not that fat)
8. Confusing linesmen. "i can't tell if he was offside he was a meter in front of the last defender but a meter behind him at the same time."
9. Masking attacking runs.
10. Using as a big ball for two year old children with not much coordination.
Okay i can't get 101 but leave a comment if you think of any more.